I’M JUST NOT THAT COOL

May 4, 2014by tracey Comments

The very fact I use the word cool is probably a giveaway that I am not.

 

I have been making a conscious effort to visit all sorts of places in NYC that I have been putting off all winter due to the weather and a ton of work. So, last weekend I finally took myself to the Dover Street Market. Now for those of you who are less cool than I am, The Dover Street Market is a cutting edge, design centric, mini department store, that is the brainchild of Comme des Garcons Rei Kawakubo. And for those of you who are really out of the main stream of the beyond cool- Rei Kawakubo is the Japanese designer who started out by proving the bag lady look could be high fashion and over priced.

She is a bit of genius and many people will say she is one of the truly original designers working. She has now decided to go into selling other people’s designs as well as her own in mini department stores that have sprung up in London, Tokyo and New York. Dover Street Market is the type of store I want to love but somehow cannot. Thus the reason I remain on the un-cool bench of consumerism. It’s a store not unlike Colette in Paris; considered the first really eclectic form over function, design over practical, way too cool for school store.

Though the truth is Maxfield in LA was the first of these stores I think anyone had ever seen. Though they do sell things that people can really wear and display in ways that do not feel more like art installations than fashion displays.

But Collette gets more press than any of them. People flock to these stores. I think sometimes just to say they’ve been and they “get it.” Thus making them part of the eternally cool bunch who embraces what most of the world misses. I keep going back and I never get it.

In years of traipsing through Collette, Amex (preferably Glenn’s in hand) I am yet to buy more than a lipstick or an iPhone case. So, the other day when I finally made the fahsionista’s obligatory pilgrimage to Dover Street Market I wandered around in the same befuddled way I do at Collette. Thinking how on earth can I ever incorporate these looks into my life? Wanting to be able to wear graffiti shoes and ripped stockings with deconstructed jackets and purposely torn asymmetrical skirts. But I look around and start thinking about the ease and order and wearablity of J. Crew. And I must accept the fact the high priced homeless or Lady Gaga eccentric look is just not for me. So buy one little innocuous item. As I do like walking out with a bag: And I don’t want the field trip to be for naught. And I always think I might surprise myself and be cooler than I think.

But the truth is I’m just not that cool.

This is the exterior. It is so cool there is no sign. The entrance is on a side street in a part of town with no other cool stores. I walked by it twice.
This is the exterior. It is so cool there is no sign. The entrance is on a side street in a part of town with no other cool stores. I walked by it twice.
One of the many staircases.
One of the many staircases.
This bike with the picnic  basket will be nice for someone.
This bike with the picnic basket will be nice for someone.
"My kid could paint those shoes"
“My kid could paint those shoes”
Anytime I see a turban I walk away.
Anytime I see a turban I walk away. Especially with a bra over a shirt.
You got the Lady Gaga bondage dress.
You got the Lady Gaga bondage dress.
Expensive Hawaiian shirts made in Italy.
Expensive Hawaiian shirts made in Italy.
Very pricey sneakers that look like inexpensive ones are part of the look. Always.
Very pricey sneakers that look like inexpensive ones are part of the look. Always.
I guess crutches are cool.
I guess crutches are cool.
A big black dress.
A big black dress.
Now this honestly looks like my mother's dressing ro
Now this honestly looks like my mother’s dressing room.
I actually liked these. But they were  $1500.
I actually liked these. But they were $1500.
Another staircase.
Another staircase. OK it has a theme park feel to it.
To be fair they sell wearable things. This is one of the great bags of the season. I do have one. I just can never seem to buy one in this type of environment.
To be fair they sell wearable things. This is one of the great bags of the season. I do have one. I just can never seem to buy one in this type of environment.
They sell Jill Sander. Conservative.
They sell Jill Sander. Conservative.
Grand Ole Opry meets Barbarella.
Grand Ole Opry meets Barbarella.
One of the great things Comme Des Garcons does is their leather goods.
One of the great things Comme Des Garcons does is their leather goods.
They had tons of them.
They had tons of them. Plus their famous t-shirts with the eyes.
Their logo.
Their logo.
They have a Beatles line too.
They have a Beatles line too.
They have a restaurant.  I will likely go back and try that and take my "cool" temperature yet again.
They have a restaurant. I will likely go back and try that and take my “cool” temperature yet again.
They were going in when I was leaving. They so get it. Notice the stockings and the hat. She will buy a lot.
They were going in when I was leaving. They so get it. Notice the stockings and the hat.
My one purchase. They pack very nicely. That is so Japanese.
They pack very nicely. That is so Japanese.
My one small purchase.I must say I use it every day.
My one small purchase.I must say I use it every day.